Added on 02/01/2012Joke

Cowboys in Action.


A true story sent in by Adam read of Access-Arb



About 8 years ago myself and an employee were removing a dead cherry; the poor thing had been ring barked by strimmers. Anyway an old red van with blue doors drove past and pulled in next door; a large red faced gent got out followed by a boy of about 10 years. The red faced gent came over and started shouting at me saying that this was his patch! And that he had priced the job we were undertaking but had not got the time anyway because he had to chop the tree down next door! He then went about his task as follows:

Firstly, the boy was sent up the tree (a Spruce of 30 feet). He had with him, a length of, what appeared to be black rope. He attached this to the top of the tree and the older man attached the other end to the bumper of the old red van.

The boy then descended the tree and was told to fetch the saw. The saw was about 30 years old (a 031 Stihl I think) with the chain hanging freely and black oil dripping from it.

The boy then got into the van and to our amazement started the engine and took up the strain (he had obviously done this before as he had lovely clutch control)!

The large man started the saw with a 'yo-yo' procedure! The noise was ear shattering as it had a dodgy silencer (or none at all). The man swung the saw towards the tree with the chain lashing around at full speed. He started cutting from the far side at chest height with an angle of about 50 degrees from horizontal.

He shouted to his son, PULL! The van lurched forward, the rope went taut and then went twang as it snapped! The tree did fall but in the wrong direction. The chainsaw fell on the floor still running then stopped and the dust settled.

Both the boy and the man then made a speedy escape and as they dissapeared I noted the hand painted writing on the back door.

It read.... MR LEE.. TREE LOPPER AND TOPPER.

The whole operation happened in about 30 minutes. We went to have a look at the handy work and noted that the black rope they were using was in fact a 240 volt extension lead!